


More than just a pretty face

by Kujaku



Category: Loveless
Genre: Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-03-04
Updated: 2012-03-04
Packaged: 2017-11-01 03:28:41
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 869
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/351479
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Kujaku/pseuds/Kujaku
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>You're smiling again, Sô-chan...and it breaks my heart every time you do.</p>
            </blockquote>





	More than just a pretty face

I know that I'm a pain, I know that I annoy you. You tell me that almost everyday. You say I'm a glue-pot and that I should stop always following you around, like I'm some sort of mother hen. I won't deny that. But Sô-chan, I'm worried about you. Sounds silly, doesn't it? Like something a child would say... I've always been worried about you. I've always wanted to know where you were and what you were doing, and when you were coming back. But can you blame me?

I remember all too easily when Seimei was still around. I remember the times you'd leave without a word, and when I would lay awake, waiting for you to open the door and stumble inside. Oh how I hated Seimei for what he was doing to you. I hated him for turning you into a zombie, living only for his commands and ignoring everything, and everybody else. And how I loved you all the more...  
Why you chose to be my room-mate, how I managed to get that close to you I'll never know. You always shunned the other students, you always ignored them, with those fearless eyes and mask-like face. But you came to me.

Yes...

You came to me when you were battered and bruised. You came to me to have me clean you up and bandage you. The rest of the time, you almost ignored my presence, no matter how I tried to get you to see me. Hell, even the stolen kisses I took had little effect on you. You just looked at me like I was an annoying fly that you couldn't get rid of.  
And I felt like such a fool, knowing how you felt, knowing that you belonged to Seimei, and yet knowing that I lived for your touch, even if it only came through Band-Aids and disinfectant. You would look at me, and then the words formed on your mouth.  
-Thank you, Kio... Those words...I quite simply wanted to taste them from your lips, but then you'd leave and go back to your room. And leave me alone.

And now what? You're smiling, laughing even. Looking at your mobile and waiting for the brat to leave you an order. I've seen first-hand the changes in you since Seimei died and gave you to Ritsuka. You've mellowed out and warmed to others; I can touch you without the need of bandages. I wondered why at first, delighted at your new persona (no way I'll ever get you to do all I want to you...but it's still a good surprise!) and then I learned that the reason was the Aoyagi brat. You'd gone from one master to another, without thinking about who you'd leave behind. I hated Seimei even more then, Sô-chan. Hated him for making you loose yourself, and hated him for having a brother to start it all over again.  
And where does all this leave me? You're happier now. You don't need me like you used to. The brat takes care of you now, doesn't he? He's the one who gets to put his hands on you...

And of course he should! He's the reason you get hurt in the first place, of course he should heal you! And yet... I sometimes wish he'd ignore you...like Seimei did. So that you'd come back to me.  
Sorry Sô-chan, I don't really think that. It's just hard for me to realize that you don't need me anymore. And I don't really hate him. Not really... He's made you this warm and happy person I get to see all day long. You even push me away when I try those stolen kisses again, and that makes me oddly happy. You know I'm there, you've seen me, and you're noting my presence.  
But I hate Ritsuka.

Because he's yours. And I'm not.

What am I to you, Sô-chan? Do you know how painful it is to watch the person you love with all your soul simply light up at the thought of someone else? Or don't you care...? You can't just throw me away, now that you've found this other Aoyagi... You'll see...he'll leave you to bleed and fall by yourself, just like Seimei did. And I'll be the only one to to take care of you, like I've done these past years.  
If only you knew how much I hate him. If only you knew how much I thank him. If only you knew that no matter how often I have to spend sleepless nights, waiting for you to call me or to open the door, I'll be there.

I won't give up on you ôu-chan. I might even be able to get more than a kiss out of you one day... Who knows?

Hell, Ritsuka's coming over tonight, you told me. So let the beer flow and with it my worries. I might even be able to stop those two hentai kids from lounging over each-other long enough to eat my sukiyaki. They're a bad influence on the brat...watch out or they'll snatch him from you! Only kidding...

Ready to go Sou-chan? I'm waiting.

Like I'll always be...


End file.
